Are you a good role model to the students around you? Also, do you feel that your students watch you to gain the emotional resources that he or she may need to survive in a life of poverty? Have you ever deposited emotional resources into a student's "Emotional Memory Bank?" Were they positive emotional resources or negative ones? Can you give us a specific example of a time or a situation where you deposited emotional resources (positive or negative) into a student's "Emotional Memory Bank."
Don't forget to respond to at least two other posts.
38 comments:
As a teacher, I'd like to believe that I am a good role model. Let's face it, our students hang on to our every word, mannerism, action, and style of dress. Students see and hear us even when we are unaware that they are peeking. We definitely impact the "Emotional Memory Banks" of our students.
A few years ago, an irate parent challenged another teacher who angrily confronted me. Because the parent's son was one of my students, the teacher simply seemed to believe that I had reported her (the teacher) to the parent. Neither the other teacher nor me took the time to speak clarification and understanding, we just engaged in an angry and loud verbal exchange of words. We were both heated and the funny part is I shouted back at her and didn't have a clue as to what was going on nor why it was going on. Two days later, a student made a point of telling me that I had really told her. Boy did I feel small! However, it was at that precise time that I apologized to that student for my part in that horrible display and that same day, I went to that teacher's class to apologize for my words and to get some understanding into the reasons for my being accused. It was then, that that teacher apologized to me for a misunderstanding that had nothing to do with me. The good thing about these apologies was that the student who boasted me was able to see the humility in both the other teacher and myself. I've since learned to refrain from reacting quickly; listen and try to get an understanding; and to cease from commenting in anger. After all, you never know who's watching and the halls are not always clear even when you believe them to be.
Evory Johnson
Evory, you are so right in saying that students hang on to our every word, mannerism, actions and style of dress. I can remember when my brother was a student in high school, he was told by his high school counselor that he would never amount to anything. It crushed him, yet not enough to stop him from becoming an educator, successful coach, Sunday School teacher and superintendent, a member of Caldwell Male Chorus, and a great speaker. So many times we say things out of anger never really realizing how it could impact one's Emotional Memory Bank.
Augustine
I, too, would like to believe I am a good role model. I try to conduct myself in a positive and professional manner at all times. I respect my students and expect them to respect me. I hate the cliche that says, "Do as I say and not as I do." Children often imitate what they see others do and say. If one demands a student to obey a rule, then that student should know that I am willing to obey the same rule.
Within my 20 year span here at Robinson, I have encountered students who were emotionally and sexually abused. I'm reminded of one student in particular who had been sexually abused by her grandfather. This student asked me if I thought she was a bad person. I assured her that she was loved and she was smart and brave to tell someone about this inappropiate behavior. At first, eventhough the student was only 9 years old the behavior felt right and normal because it was from her grandfather who also had abused her mother when she was a child.
By having established a long-term relationship with this student, the positive emotional resource deposited into her Emotional Memory Bank helped her overcome fear and gave her courage to feel good about herself once again.
Augustine
Mrs. Cann, I truly understand you and the feelings of your brother. There is power in the tongue. The words we speak can be positive or negative for our children. We should take heed of how our words impact our children.
Evory Johnson
I pray to God that I am a positive role model to my students. Each and every morning, I spend my time with the Lord and ask Him to guide my tongue, thoughts, and footsteps. Being a role model is a heavy burden to bear. People often see our mistakes and blunders before they see our good deeds. Many of our students do not conscientiously think of us as role models. When asked, they will give the name of a famous athlete, actor, actress, or singer. But when all the dust clears, they go home and mimic our talks and walks. Last year, I caught a group of students imitating me - boys included. I had to laugh at that. We, as educators, have a tremendous impact on our students. Just last week, a former student came to me and said, "Mrs. Neal, I like that suit you have on. You didn't wear that last year." Now, I am calculating roughly 180 days last year. How in the Sam Dickens could she recall what I did and did not wear last year! Easy...they are watching everything about us. From our change of hair styles, to our change of shoes, to our change of perfumes. They are watching us. I try to be ever so careful in the things I say and do because nothing goes unnoticed.
I spoke to a student recently. I was beginning to feel that he thought I was getting on to him because maybe I did not like him. I pulled him aside and explained to him that I get on to him so much because I expect so much from him. I told him that if I did not love him and care about him, I would let him act crazy, hang from the ceiling, and do nothing in class. We had a really good heart-to heart talk. These past few days have been wonderful. He is working harder than I have ever seen him work, and he is even offering to serve as a peer-tutor to one of my weaker students. I feel as if I have just made a huge deposit in this child's Emotional Memory Bank. And my prayers are getting answered.
Ms. Johnson, I think the establishing of long-term relationships with our students is essential. Hopefully, they will be able to tell their child/children about that bond that they shared with a teacher. And maybe, their children will try to seek the same. Long-lasting relationships as such lets the students know that we are genuinely concerned about their well-being and future. The impact that we have on our students is phenomenal.
Ms. Cann, twenty years is a long time. I can only imagine the changes you have seen across the board. Thanks for being a pillar at Robinson and a pillar in education.
Thanks Ms. Neal, the Lord should always guide our tongues, thoughts, and footsteps especially as we impact our children's "Emotional Memory Banks".
Evory Johnson
Ms. Neal, I have had students to tell me how much I helped them when I said "this or that". I never knew that I said had impacted their Emotional Mememory Bank until years later.
Augustine
You know, Miss Jackson, I agree that the choice to make our day great or not is ours. We choose to let things spoil our day, and we choose to what degree. Whatever comes our way, we must remember that "this too shall pass."
Augustine
I truly believe that I am a positive role model for all of the students at Robinson Elementary. I take this responsibiltiy very seriously because first and foremost I understand that many of our students do not interact with positive males daily. I wake up daily and focus on things that will make me a peron that my students and peers can view as one who embodies the characteristics that are exemplary of a professional.
I make it a priority to speak to each student as I see them on the hallways because everyone wants to feel appreciated and noticed. Each of us should go out of our way to let the children know that we are here for them and only for them.
Because I am a PROUD alum of Robinson I know that our students have the potential to do great things and I will continue to do everything within my power to give students that desire to achieve the tools they need to succeed at the next level and beyond.
Everyone seems to be doing the right thing when it comes to being a beacon of light for our students. I truly believe that students want to be appreciated given adulation. You can see it in the eyes of our best and brightest and also in those who underachive. There is no substitute for a positive example that can steer wayward children on the right path and be a guiding post for those that are going the right way.
I'll always give credit where it is due. the teachers that have made comments are th9ose that are definitely leading the way in being an archetype that students can model themselves after. I hope that the rest of the staff has the opportunity to develop the skills that will make them the type of role models that will positively impact our students.
Mrs. Johnson,
I agree with you that our students are pretty much watching everything that we do. Last year, I had a parent to tell me that her child wanted her to purchase a particular pair of shoes because I had them. The parent then when on to tell me that I had no idea how much my name was carried on in their house. She said that it gets to the point that she doesn't want to hear anything about me. Simple things like that tell me that no matter what we do in our classroom, our students are watching. The best impact to have on them is positive. Because of the odds they have set against them already, we should be nothing but positive role models for our children.
Janitra Jackson
Mr. Watson,
In response to your comment on steering wayward children on the right path and serving as a guiding post, I fully agree. As an educator, we are in the position to pretty much change generations. It is evident that many of our children do not have positive role models to learn from and therefore we must compensate for what they do not have. With our children knowing that they have someone in the corner, they tend to work harder. At times, they accomplish goals just impress us.
Janitra Jackson
When I first began working in the school system, I started working as a paraprofessional. One year, I had a student in my tutoring class tell me that she wanted to be just like me. I didn't know if that was a good or bad thing (not that I had done anything negative) so I made it my point to make sure that I only sent positive messages to the students from that point on. I was told by the students that the other teachers at the school don't listen to them. I realized that some children just want to be heard. Listening to the students tell you about how much fun they had at the movies over the weekend means a lot to them. Knowing that we care about them has a great impact on our children.
As I see former students that I worked with, I'm always given an update on what they are doing, how they're grades are, etc.
Wow. I am loving all of you right now. You are true beacons of light in the lives of the students at Robinson. I am proud to call you friends and co-workers. Many time people just get the profound effect they have on someone's life. I have lived through some really great teachers and some really bad ones too. It is good to know that there are not any bad ones at R.E.S.
I agree with Mrs. Johnson. Students hang on every word, and why shouldn't they, after all that is what we are constantly trying to get them to do. In my class room, I know I am often heard telling children to pay attention, or questioning them to make sure they are paying attention. We cannot expect them to pay attention only when we want them to. We must realize that everything that comes out of our mouth is being observed by them. The way we handle big and small situations can be a learning experience for them. We are constantly being role models, even when we do not realize it.
I agree with Mrs. Neal. I strive to be a positive role model. I have had a similar situation happen with a student. After speaking with the student, his behavior was wonderful. Giving him positive words and not prejudging him gave him something different to deposit in his emotional memory bank instead of negative comments, which he was used to hearing.
You are right Meredith. Not only do they hang on our every word but they try to participate in adult conversations. As teachers, we have to watch what we say in front of them. On another note, we will never exactly know whose emotional bank we are investing in from day to day.
Nicole Dodson
I hope I am a good role model for my students. I try my best to show them how they should behave. I have had a lot of problems with angry students this year who get easily frustrated. I try to show them how to behave when they feel this way. If you have seen my class or walked through you know there are a few students who can easily drive you to frustration. When I begin to get frustrated I demonstrate the technique of breathing and counting to ten, we talk about this early on. I make sure I am calm before I address the one student or whole class. I have also talked to some students how to let me know they are angry. They have to know that there are other ways to let people know you are angry besides screaming and swinging.
H. Gasper
Your right Mrs. Johnson our kids hang on every word and action. I always like to listen to my kids while they are at centers or in free play time. It's amazing how many of them mimmic things that I say or do.
H. Gasper
I agree with you Mr. Watson. You as a male role model almost hold extra responsibility because you might be one of very few they ever see. It is wonderful that you realize that and embrace it.
H. Gasper
I would like to think that I am a good role model to all children. I have several children in my class this year that have moved here from other schools. The parents have really let me know that with out my encouragement and positvie attitude toward all children, that their children would not be where they are today. These are all different families. The children are going home telling things that are going on in the classroom and the parents are very encouraging to me when I call and talk to them. I did not realize how powerful a person that I was when I am in front of the children. I realize that they watch and sometimes memic my actions, and that I need to be a very positive role model each and every day to all children and adults that I make contact with.
This one child that I am talking about feels very secure and saft in my classroom. When he found out how many days we were going to be out for Thanksgiving he did not want to go home, he wanted to stay with me. (I don't know if that was good or bad)
I will keep on depositing positive resources in each and every child's "Emotional Memory Bank."
Mrs. Johnson
I agree 100% that children watch and sometimes say exactly what you are doing or saying. I try to be positive and encouraging, so when they do copy me it will be nice not ugly.
Mrs Cann
I can only hope that after twenty years of service that I am also a positive role model that is depositing in many different "Emotional Banks."
Yes, I am a very good role model for my students. Like Mr. Watson I make a daily effort to get up and prepare for my students. I know most of you can't tell,but I pray with mothers on the phone every morning,before I come to work. Yes, I make daily deposit into their lives. I write Heroes of the Week on the board where I share the life of some successful person, for example, Tiger Woods, Mayor Mayo, chair of the I Can Learn Extravaganza, and I sing the song I Can Learn with them. Honestly, my impact is not always positive, but I work very hard.
Cleoria Dunn
I agree with Mrs.Johnson,
our student hang on to ou very word, mannerism, action and style of dress. As most of you know my favorite word is NOW. I can walk the hall and all I hear is NOW!
Cleoria Dunn
I think they all want to go home with you Mrs. Hernandez, you make learning fun and you really love them.
Cleoria Dunn
I’ve always believed in leading by example. I believe it for my children at home but especially for my students who may not have positive role models at home. Our students look up to us, hang on our every word, and watch our every move. What kind of example are we setting if we tell them “Do as I say, not as I do!”? By exhibiting appropriate, positive responses to certain situations and life experiences, we provide them with examples of appropriate behavior they can bank on as an emotional resource.
Karen Holland
Mrs. Neal, I can relate to your comment about the student you were having trouble with since you did not like him. It requires much more effort to be a positive role model when a particularly difficult child makes it hard to like them and sincerely care about them. I’m sure they do feel that we are getting on to them because we do not like them. That would be a natural response. That would be MY response. When we pull them aside and explain to them that we get on to them because we have high expectations for them, we love them, and care about them, it makes a huge difference. It may not be at first, but after they see genuine concern and interest over time, that difference will become apparent. That is definitely a substantial deposit in a child's Emotional Memory Bank.
Karen Holland
I try very hard to be a positive role model for all of the students at Robinson Elementary. Mrs. Dunn and Mr. Watson make very good points when they talk about positive interactions, especially with a strong, male role model like Mr. Watson. Making it a priority to speak to each student and inquire about how they’re doing makes them feel appreciated and they know someone does care. We should ALL go out of our way to let the children know that we are here for them to support them however may be possible.
Karen Holland
I believe that I am a good role model. Every day I wake up and know that my actions will impact a child's life. I pray that the impact is always positive. Three years ago during my teaching in south Louisiana I experienced an encounter that reminds me how blessed I am every day. There was a child, 9 years old who would come to school every day despite a cold, high fever, etc. Not only would he come with that but also covered in bruises and injuries. I started talking to him and he learned to trust me. Because trust was a word and action he wasnt familiar with. Every day we would talk and the stories were so heart wrenching. Through many phone calls and cries for help the student was finally taken from that abusive home and placed with a wonderful family. I still talk to this child on a regular basis and every time I speak with him he always thanks me for taking the time to understand him and for giving him a wonderful family. Even at times when we feel down and lost that desire for that day there is always someone watching you.
DeWanna Granger
Wow Mrs. Cann! I didn't realize you have been teaching that long. No wonder your such a wonderful influence.
DeWanna Granger
Ms. McBride,
That was such a nice comment. I agree with you. We all have our stories. Some sad and happy but its with these stories that we can create legacies.
DeWanna Granger
I try very hard to be a positive role model for my students. For my girls, I target their self-esteem. I make them think and feel like they are "intelligent, beautiful black girls" whose self-worth is not found in what's on the outside of them. While at the same time make sure they understand they don't have to feel threatened by another female who has high self-esteem. I monitor my attire very closely so they can see the dress and style of a successful black female as opposed to what they see on television and other places. They need to understand, as my grandmother would say, there's a time and place for everything. I talk to them about the appropriate way to dress, speak and carry themselves and compliment them when the do so. They are held to that same standard even when I see them in the community.
With my male students, I tell them they are "strong, powerful black boys" who can grow up to be powerful leaders in their families and communities. I also make them aware of their dress and attitude and how others perceive those behaviors. I make them open doors for myself as well as their female classmates. I put great emphasis on their treatment of female students. Most of them are unaware of the appropriate treatment of females.
I make all of them, both male and female, treat each other with respect.
I strive to be a role model to the kids that I come into contact with, whether it be my students, kids I've coached over the years, or even my own kids. I feel that our society expects the wrong people to be role models to our children, especially professional atheletes, musicians, or other celebrities. I agree with what Charles Barkley said years ago: "I am not a role model. Parents should be role models." I feel that a child's role models should be his or her parents, as well as any other adults whom the child comes into contact with on a regular basis, such as relatives, teachers, church members, etc. These are the people who will eventually shape and mold the child's personality, not a professional athelete or celebrity. Parents need to show their children how to live, and get away from the "Do as I say, not as I do" attitude. This will not help these children at all in the end. I feel that we should also be there for kids to help them emotionally. So many times I have watched teachers or administrators often lose control and say things that they shouldn't say. How can you sit and try to tell a child about controlling their own emotions when you as an authority figure can't control your own? This doesn't make much sense to me. I try to teach my students to find ways to cope with their everyday problems, such as playing your favorite video game when you get angry, watching a movie, going to sleep, etc. I also tell them that getting angry is a normal reaction in life. However, it is not an excuse when you do something bad. You have consequences for your actions.
Glenn Antonio Kline
I almost can't type because of the big ole' tears in my eyes! I know some of you well enough to know that you would move the world to help our students. I hope and pray (daily!) that I am providing the love, acceptance, support and encouragement that ALL children need. I understand that our students (and other students of poverty) desperately need positive role models, often because they may not have many (if any) at home. But, as a mother of a special needs child, I have never been able to look at any children, without seeing them as sweet young spirits who need to be nurtured and loved. I left the big bucks word of corporate America because I felt called to teach special needs children-- the fact that my only child has these same needs as our students (academically as well as emotionally-- he was abandoned by his father years ago, because of his needs), only reinforces what I do and WHY I do it. I consider it a blessing that God put me in a situation where I have to open myself up so much in order to reach my son, and "my children" at school. I wish everyone could have the opportunity to really feel for this kids-- it would make the world a better place. Oh, and btw, last year I overhead one of my students say "oh mercy" when they dropped their books... yes, they definitely store everything we say and do in long term memory!
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